Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Job Hunters: Please Absolute your Bacon Requirements

Holy unemployed, Batman!!!  Why do I have the feeling Chinese scammers using an automated (and poorly performing) language translater are now targeting the desperate job-seeker?  Check out the following job posting on craigslist:


Opes Advisors, Inc., an apart endemic Mortgage Banking and Investment Administration close is currently gluttonous a abounding time Receptionist for their Palo Alto accumulated office.

Job Responsibilities:
* Greet clients
* Answer admission calls and absolute appropriately
* Assist in accident planning/preparation
* Clerical abutment for Investment Administration Division
* Provide aback up authoritative abutment to President's Executive Assistant
* Report to President's Executive Assistant

Job Qualifications
* Superior accounting and exact advice skills
* Knowledge of MS Word, Outlook and Excel a must. Powerpoint a plus
* Ability to multi assignment in a active ambiance with little supervision
* Project oriented
* Prior acquaintance in appointment administration a audible plus
* Excellent chase through is a must

*** This position will activate as acting with the absorbed to catechumen the acknowledged and advantageous applicant to a abiding employee.
By allotment Opes Advisors, Inc. you are allotment to be allotment of a aggregation apprenticed by arete and committed to success! Also included in this agitative befalling is a aggressive bacon and allowances package. Please absolute all resumes and bacon requirements to: resumes@opesadvisors.com or fax: 650-319-1610.


Um, I’m really not interested in becoming an “allotment to be allotment of a aggregation apprenticed by arete and committed to success!”  What’s “arete” anyway or, for that matter, “catechumen??”  I will admit that the “aggressive bacon and allowances package” sounds great!

Is this kind of job posting just a LITTLE discouraging?

Nah.  I have no intention of looking for a job on craigslist, of all places, craigslist being one of the premium websites for scammers to hone their skills.  This posting came up in a Google Alert that I have set up and I looked at it just out of curiosity.  And I did get a rollicking laugh out of it!!

Job-hunting is harder than ever these days.  Even setting aside the impact of the current high unemployment numbers (aka lots of competition), the fact that most of it is done over the internet with very little feedback from potential employers (seldom even a “we received your resume” auto-reply (what’s up with that?), just equals a very lonely task.

It’s discouragingly clear that it’s totally an employer’s market.

How I miss the days when you could simply walk into a company, freshly printed resume in hand, and ask to see the hiring manager!

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